My fiancee and I have been trying to conceive for over two years and I found out last December that we are expecting and I am due on 8-21-08. However, my fiancee's cancer has spread and we are not sure if he is going to make it to see our baby. Some days I wake up and I just don't know how I can do this by myself. His family is really supportive of me and they constantly offer whatever help they can but I feel like its not enough. I just don't know how I am going to be able to raise our son by myself. If anyone can relate please give me some advice. I feel like I'm in a black hole, we have waited so long for this joy and I feel that God has just taken it away from me.

Alexandria,

I'm very sorry to hear about your fiancee, 1st things first, Thank God for giving you a wonderful man in the first place to have a baby with..

If you something happens and your fiancee doesn't make it, God chose you to carry his baby, and even though that is a very hard to do on any givin day, your job is going to be much harder, but God choose you, if you love your fiancee, which I'm sure you do, how you thought about doing a early wedding?

That way, your baby will have some special memories of what your love was and is together...

You have to be happy that God loved you and your fiancee so much, that he blessed you with a son, and whatever time you have together as a family, whether it is specal pre-delivery time or 2 minutes, or a life time, he choose you to be a mom, and you have a duty to your baby to love and cherish and support that child no matter what...

My mom ditched me when she was going through a hard time, and you just can't leave your children, you will get through this,

I will pray for your family, My hubby and I have 5 kids, 3 miscarriages, and waiting till June for our last baby to get pregnant, my hubby and I are self employed and he is gone alot, we have a centeral heat and air business, so well 10 min the morning and 10 min before bed is what we see of him in the summer, 6-7 days a week, we are blessed, but it is hard because he is gone so much.

If you need to chat my email is bigt@hotmail.com

I used to be a nurse for over 10yrs, I'm older now, I'm 37, but I worked as an oncology nurse for over 3 yrs..

I will pray for your fiancee that God heals him, but If you believe in God, then you know, we all have our name in the Book of life, and what day and time of when we go to heaven, God is the only one who knows when that time is.. Don't let Dr's tell you what day and time,,, just pray and let God tell you. I had patients that came from Dr.'s who told them they had 6mths to live and they are still alive today...

Yes, Dr,'s help with prediciating based on tests etc.. but God is the only predictor of time... Don't lose your faith in God, If your fiancee doesn't make it, your son and you will meet him in Heaven again... I promise, that is what faith is....

Well I hope this helped, I'm sure not a whole lot will help words are words, but try to use them as a blanket and surround yourself with postive thoughts and love,, don't let the devil win, he can't win unless you lose your faith.

Prayers to you

Dana

 I'm so sorry to hear about your fiancee's condition. God has chosen you to carry his baby and that is a blessing. Dealing with a loss will be hard but I pray that he makes it. God does his things in miraculous ways. Good luck to you and we are here for you!

I cannot begin to imagine the pain in your heart on a daily basis. He is still with you though, live each day like it's your last! When you look into your baby's eyes for the first time you will feel a love like you have never known, that I can promise you. You may even see his father in his eyes. You will never be by yourself as long as you have your family by your side. I wish you the best and I will say a prayer for you. Love and laughter are the best medicine, don't give up.

Thank you all. We go back to the doctor this week to see if has made any progress, I hate watching him go through chemo. I just wish it could be over with you know. But it's nice to have some support since I really don't spend time with my old friends any more. I think all my stress has finally warded them off ={.

I am so sorry to hear about a happy occasion having a down side.

The best thing I can suggest is to make a video.  Have your husband recorded giving message to his son that he will be able to see and understand as he gets older.  It gives them the chance to see they were not left behind, they can relate to their dad and know his voice and his eyes, his sounds.  It gives you a change to always remember your love and how much he meant to you.  It is a painful thing to do I am sure, but I know years later I would love to have it.

You are all in my prayers and thoughts.

Kim

Alexandria,

Any updates on you and your family?

Keep us posted if you can.

Dana Lu